A wish isn't a planEveryday life

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A wish isn't a plan

A short book about setting a big goal every January and having no idea what you'll do on a wet Tuesday

25 chapters11,077 wordsAbout 50 minFirst edition

What's inside

·Before you startThis is a short book and you can read it in two or three sittings. It's about one habit, which is setting a large goal at the start of the year, feeling…2 min
1The first of January, againIt's the first of January and you feel unusually clear. Last year is behind you and it has a shape now, and the shape has some things in it you'd rather…2 min
2Why the wish feels like the workBefore taking the habit apart, it's worth being fair to it, because it isn't stupid and it isn't laziness. Making the wish meets real needs, and if the…2 min
3"This year's different"Every January it feels like this year is different, and the feeling is not a delusion. Hengchen Dai, Katherine Milkman and Jason Riis published a paper in…2 min
4"It works, people do it"You might object that resolutions do work, that you know people who got fit one January and stayed fit. You'd be right, and it's worth being precise about…2 min
5"I just need to want it enough"The most natural thing to do with a wish is to dwell on it. You picture yourself at the end. Fit, lighter, fluent, the book on a shelf. It feels…2 min
6"Once I've decided, the how will follow"Here's the belief chapter 2 said the book would examine. Deciding is the hard part. Once you've truly decided, the doing takes care of itself, the way it…2 min
7"The first two weeks went fine"The good fortnight is real, and it's the most misleading part of the year. For two weeks after the first of January you do the thing. You run three times.…2 min
8"I'll do it properly or not at all"Wishes are large by nature, and part of the appeal is the size. Not "walk more" but "run a half marathon". Not "write on Tuesdays" but "finish the novel".…2 min
9"Big goals are motivating"You may have read that ambitious goals get more out of people than modest ones, and that's a fair summary of a real body of research. Edwin Locke and Gary…2 min
10"I'll do it every day"The other thing the wish tends to be is daily. Every day, from the first. And for the good fortnight, every day it is, and then a day gets missed and…2 min
11"I'll start Monday"The fresh start effect from chapter 3 doesn't only happen in January. It happens every Monday, on the first of each month, after every holiday and every…2 min
12"I've bought the kit, so I've started"There's a version of the good fortnight that happens before the first of January, and it's spent in shops. The running shoes. The language app…2 min
13"One slip and it's over"The drop is usually a single day. You missed the run, or you ate the thing, or you didn't open the document. And then something happens that isn't in the…2 min
14"I don't have time"By the third week of January the honest account of the drop is usually that there wasn't time. The evenings filled up. Work came back. Something needed…2 min
15"I failed, so it's me"The last belief is the one the rerun is built on, and it's the most damaging because it feels like humility. The wish failed, so the problem is you. You…2 min
16What the rerun costs youIt's worth being plain about what the habit costs, because from the inside it feels cheap. A wish that fails is just a wish. Nothing was lost but the…2 min
17What it does to the wishThere's one more thing the cycle does, and it's to the wish itself. Each rerun makes the wish larger. Not on purpose. It's that the wish has to make up…2 min
18Turn the wish into a TuesdayPick one wish. Not the list. One. The people in Norcross's study who succeeded had a specific thing, and the whole argument of this book is that a Tuesday…2 min
19The Sunday five minutesThe sentence is written once and looked at weekly, and the weekly look is what stops the sentence going the way of the wish. On Sunday, at a time you'll…2 min
20The decisionHere's the rule, and then what to expect. The rule. One wish at a time, written as a Tuesday sentence at its least version, looked at for five minutes…2 min
21The weight goal, the drink goal, the money goal, the big life goal, and when it's more than a wishMost Januaries hold a handful of the same wishes, and some of them need a word more than the rule. The weight goal. This is the most common resolution in…2 min
22When the drop cameIt's February, or it's May, and the sentence has stopped. Three planned days went and you haven't looked at it since, and the old feeling is back, that…2 min
23The wet TuesdayIt's a Tuesday in February and it's raining. You got home at half past six because the meeting ran over, there's nothing in for dinner, and a form needs…2 min
·NotesThese notes give the sources behind each chapter and say where the text goes beyond them. The book isn't medical advice. Where it mentions low mood…5 min