Notes

This book gives general information about an everyday habit. It isn't medical or psychological advice, and it's no substitute for a GP or a therapist who knows you. The NHS guidance I mention is for England as I found it in September 2026.

I've kept sources out of the chapters where I could so they read easily. Here they are by chapter, with the limits I'm aware of. Unless I say otherwise, I read the published summary of each paper and not the full text. I checked each paper for a retraction or correction notice in September 2026 and found none. Where a chapter isn't listed, it rests on my own reasoning. That includes chapters 1, 2, 6, 7, 10, 11, 14, 19, 20, 23 and 24. The desk, the queue, the flat evening, the Sunday basket and the friend who cancelled are invented.

Before you start. The advice not to stop heavy daily drinking without medical help is the general NHS position on alcohol withdrawal. The two-week guide for low mood and the self-referral to talking therapies are from the NHS pages on depression and on stress. The Samaritans number is from the NHS stress page.

Chapter 3. Verduyn, Delvaux, Van Coillie, Tuerlinckx and Van Mechelen, "Predicting the duration of emotional experience: two experience sampling studies", Emotion 9, 2009, pages 83 to 91. Five emotions recorded daily. The summary doesn't give typical durations, so the claim that most small feelings are over in minutes is my inference from the predictors and not a figure from the paper. The wave as a description is mine.

Chapter 4. Bowen and Marlatt, "Surfing the urge: brief mindfulness-based intervention for college student smokers", Psychology of Addictive Behaviors 23, 2009, pages 666 to 671. One hundred and twenty-three students, a single session of instructions, a week's follow-up, described by the authors as preliminary. The extension from smoking urges to other feelings is mine. The alibi is mine. The earlier book on food is Eat when you're hungry, in this series.

Chapter 5. Bowen and Marlatt, and Verduyn and colleagues, as above. The claim that the fear of the peak is an untested forecast is my reasoning.

Chapter 8. Kashdan, Barrios, Forsyth and Steger, "Experiential avoidance as a generalized psychological vulnerability: comparisons with coping and emotion regulation strategies", Behaviour Research and Therapy 44, 2006, pages 1301 to 1320. Two studies, the second over twenty-one days. The work is correlational and the chapter says so. The claim that each reach teaches a lesson is mine.

Chapter 9. The NHS page "Stress", for the advice not to use alcohol, cigarettes, gambling or drugs to relieve it, and "10 stress busters", for temporary relief that creates new problems. The claim that the four remedies are interchangeable is mine.

Chapter 12. Verduyn and colleagues as above, for reappearance. Kircanski, Lieberman and Craske, "Feelings into words: contributions of language to exposure therapy", Psychological Science 23, 2012, pages 1086 to 1091. People afraid of spiders, four conditions, tested a week later. The labelling group differed on skin conductance and marginally on approach, and not on self-reported fear, which the chapter says.

Chapter 13. Bowen and Marlatt as above.

Chapter 15. Kashdan and colleagues as above. What I say about the quiet after a ridden wave is observation and not a finding.

Chapter 16. Kashdan and colleagues as above. The NHS page "Stress". The earlier books in this series on each remedy are The phone can wait, You didn't want it yesterday, The biscuit tin and Eat when you're hungry.

Chapter 17. Verduyn and colleagues as above. Leyro, Zvolensky and Bernstein, "Distress tolerance and psychopathological symptoms and disorders: a review of the empirical literature among adults", Psychological Bulletin 136, 2010, pages 576 to 600. A review that documents associations and also a good deal of inconsistency in how the construct is defined and measured. The loop I describe is my reasoning.

Chapter 18. Kircanski and colleagues as above. The method is mine. "Would an apple do?" is the hunger test from Eat when you're hungry.

Chapter 21. Gollwitzer and Sheeran, "Implementation intentions and goal achievement: a meta-analysis of effects and processes", Advances in Experimental Social Psychology 38, 2006, pages 69 to 119. The rule hasn't been tested as a package, and what I say to expect is my expectation and not a finding.

Chapter 22. The NHS pages "Stress" and "10 stress busters" as above. The NHS pages on depression, alcohol and gambling as verified for earlier books in this series. Beat is the UK eating disorder charity.