Toddlers, teenagers, the child who finds it harder, the other parent, and the morning that can't be slow

Most of the book assumes a child somewhere between four and fourteen and a parent with a bit of room. Here are the cases where that's not quite you.

Toddlers. Under about three, most of the jobs in this book aren't theirs yet and the method is smaller. It's the spoon. It's letting them push the arm into the sleeve you're holding. It's the NHS advice from chapter 4, which is to wait until they seem ready, try, and if it doesn't work, leave it a few weeks. The wanting arrives early and the thing to do with it is to let it have the spoon, not to hand over the shoes.

Teenagers. At fourteen the jobs are bigger, the phone call, the form, the washing, the appointment, and the habit has had longer to teach both of you. The method's the same and the announcement matters more, because a teenager handed a job without warning hears a punishment. Say it's theirs, say what done looks like, and then be somewhere else, because a teenager watched is a teenager who stops. Expect more objection and a shorter fortnight, since they learn fast when they've decided to. And expect the older habits, the "can you just", to be the ones that need the chapter 22 sentence most.

The child who finds it harder. Some children find most tasks harder than others their age, and it isn't one task but the pattern. The NHS page on ADHD in children describes trouble following instructions and forgetting everyday tasks like brushing teeth or putting on socks, and it's careful to say that many children are like that at times, especially under five, without it meaning anything. The NHS page on the signs of autism describes differences in communication, play and response to change, and says that every autistic child is different. If your child's pattern is more than age, the first person to talk to is their teacher, who can involve the school's special educational needs coordinator, and the GP if you're still concerned. For those children the method still applies. It applies with smaller steps, more of the least help, a longer fortnight, and a "done" that's set for that child rather than for a chart. Nothing in this book means expecting a child to manage what their condition makes very hard. It means not doing the parts they could do, which are usually more than the takeover has been allowing.

The other parent. If one of you hands the bag over and the other packs it, the bag isn't handed over. The NHS advice on everyday skills is that a child learns more easily when everyone who looks after them takes a similar line, and that's this. Agree the one job together, and agree the "done", and agree the sentence for the tight morning. If you can't agree, start with a job that's only in your half of the week.

The morning that can't be slow. There'll be one. The bus, the hospital appointment, the day you overslept. Do the takeover, and say the sentence from chapter 23. "I'm doing this because we're late, and it's yours tomorrow." That's the whole of it. A takeover with the sentence attached is an exception. A takeover without it is the habit.

The job that's not safe. The hob, the road, the medicine cupboard, the bath for a small child, the front door. These stay with you, and no argument in this book moves them. What can move is the part next to them. The child can get the pan out and you can put it on the heat. They can hold your hand across the road and choose when to cross. The least help works at the edge of a job you're keeping, too.